A first-line exercise. I’m given a first line, and I see where it goes. This is where this one went.
It’s days like these I regret having my horns removed. People warned me at the time, it’s true. They said I’d come to rue the day. They said it would all end in tears. They said I wouldn’t be myself without them. But you know how it is when people are behaving all pious; all holier-than-thou. They look down their snouts at you, and tell you how you ought to be living your life, but they just don’t get the basic psychology. Nobody likes being dictated to. Nobody likes being treated as though they’re stupid, or even doing a stupid thing, and if you push them, they’ll push back. They’ll resist your advice, even if it’s, technically, not entirely without merit.
So I resisted the advice. I got all riled up because people were criticising me; so I just rushed ahead and did it. Proved my point. See? I can survive without. I am more than my horns. We are more than our horns! Don’t you people see that? Will you always be slaves to the stereotypes?
But I don’t think they do see it, a lot of the time. And I admit, on days like this, I do wonder whether it was really worth it, because to be honest the disadvantages kind of outweigh the benefits. Oh, sure, I can get through more doors this way, but what’s the good of that when everyone on the other side of that door runs for cover the moment they see you? Nobody stops and looks. No-one says, “well, hey, he ain’t got no horns”, and asks themselves what that might mean for, you know, the interpersonal dynamic.
No, they’re all about the monster. Seems like it’s all they can see.
Perhaps there are better ways of getting the point across. Perhaps. I mean, I don’t see Ogteighubhlo and his songs winning us many hearts and minds, so I don’t think that’s the way. That’s not a criticism of Ogteighubhlo, by the way; at least he’s getting out there and doing something, which is more than you can say for some of us. But yeah, I don’t mind admitting… well, actually I do mind admitting, and if you tell anyone I’ve said any of this, I’ll deny it. But, you know, sometimes I do wonder if I could’ve done something with more… I dunno… more impact on the world, you know? But maybe with less impact on me.
Ah, listen to me. Look, forget I said anything. We’re here now. We’ve come all this way, and like I said, at least we’re doing something. Now, I’ve got to get these guys organised…
Okay, everybody! Are we all ready? Everyone got their t-shirts? Oh, come on… Hey, can someone lend Bogo-llogu a t-shirt? Elders, Bogo-llogu, will you ever be ready for anything? All right – we got the playlist set? Speakers all good? All right, everyone: let’s do this thing!